- WordPress Forum Bozo Policy: Instead of making posts invisible to all but the poster, instead, when that person tries to leave a new reply, do one of the following:
- Send an electrical shock through the keyboard. Needed: Better technology.
- Start flashing strobe light from monitor so annoying they just leave.
- Flash very brief subliminal message to be nice, potentially use Wil Wheaton floating head with “Don’t be a dick” speech bubble — surely he’d grant permission?
- Create a job similar to the Google Doodler, where the sole activity is creating easter eggs for WordPress. Each release cycle, the release lead can choose one to use. Job Title: Easter Bunny.
Hat tip to final stretch dinner companions Konstantin Kovshenin, Tom Willmot, Scribu, Ryan Hellyer, Kailey Lampert, Owain Cuvelier, Joe Hoyle.
- Plugin so that if a commenter tries to leave any textspeak (“u r” instead of “you are,” etc), treat them to the same kind of subliminal flashes described above, but this one says, “Be a grownup. Use your words!”